When Race Comes Between Us: Repairing Ruptures in Mixed Relationships Workshop with Charmaine McCaulay and Lizzie Cummings

A) When Race Comes Between Us: Repairing Ruptures in Mixed Relationships

Kintsugi is a Japanese art that repairs broken pottery with gold, rendering a new piece that is more exquisite than it was before the break.

“The wound is the place where the Light enters you.” — Rumi

Have you ever felt unseen or misunderstood in your interracial relationship?

When a racial rupture occurs, how do you both tend to the wounding?

When race enters the room, how does it shape your relationships?

This experiential seminar offers a supportive space to explore the complexities of racial breaches in mixed race relationships.

Whether with a partner, friend, co-parent, or colleague, navigating racial dynamics can lead to both deep connections and painful ruptures. Through personal storytelling, guided discussions, and reflective exercises, we will explore how to tend to ruptures with care, honesty, and courage.

What Happens When a Racial Breach Occurs?

Through Charmaine and Lizzie’s lived experience, they have identified

Four Stages of a Racial Breach:

• The Shattering – A rupture occurs, leading to a breakdown in communication and trust. Pain, grief and loss arise.
• The Retreat – Both individuals begin to process the pain separately, confronting feelings of abandonment, shame, anger, white fragility, internalized racism and hierarchy of culture in feelings and expressions.
• The Orbiting – A delicate dance of circling each other, staying with the discomfort rather than rushing to resolution.
• A Different Season – The relationship evolves. How do we return to each other truthfully and with car

Who is this event for:

This seminar is for individuals in significant mixed race relationships, including:

Romantic partners (cohabiting, married, or dating)

• Close friendships navigating racial differences.
• Strong working relationships (colleagues, business partners, co-creators).
• Divorced or separated co-parents who remain connected through their children.
• Psychotherapists who want to deepen their understanding of how to tend to racial and cultural ruptures in relationships.

Learning objectives:

Use the four-stage model

(Shattering, Retreat, Orbiting, A Different Season)

as a guide for navigating racial ruptures in intimate, familial, social, and professional relationships.

Foster trust and resilience in mixed race partnerships

Gain a deeper understanding of the emotional and psychological effects of racial tension to sustain long-term, healthy relationships across racial differences.

Engage in meaningful repair and rebuilding

Understand how to navigate racial breaches in ways that foster deeper connection, accountability, and ongoing growth.